Animal Trailblazer T-Shirts

"Your bone."

The experienced backpacker.

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

'It's not easy being ahead of your time.'

Overworked in the office

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Trail mix?"

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

Hither and Yon sign

"Don't even think about it."

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

Women in a cross country race

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

Wherever the Trail Leads. . .

"Quick swig first?"

"I accidentally shredded an important document, so I'm trying to piece it back together. It should only take a few years."

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

'No, this is not Mel's secretary. This is Mel.'

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

'I don't know what he's doing or why he's doing it, but by golly, I love his work ethic.'

Glass Ceiling

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

"What happened to the good old Jewish holidays when all we used to do was eat?"

"Just to be clear, this is a hike, not a ‘walk.’"

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

National Park Map

Nearest Backache Specialist.

"You can take her ... just pretend she's my mother."