Animal Talker Pillows

'Every year it's the same thing. I resolve to lose a ton and you say you're going to control your anger.'

"People are O.K., but I prefer little pieces of string."

"You know what the Serengeti lacks?—Decent deserts."

"Now, let your inner ‘bad dog’ answer the question ..."

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

"So, sniffed any interesting butts lately?"

"What do you think of the new feed?"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"Quick, start the car!"

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

Dog Dreams

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

'You know too much!'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

"That is an outrageous slur."

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"Just a brief moment, Linda, to thank you for my delicious meals. And if you need me by your side... just whistle." "What fresh hell is this?"

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

"You don't whisper anymore."

"...and that growl has turned many a hunter into vegetarians!"

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"