Animal Talk Show Fan T-Shirts

"I understand you've learned some new tricks since you were here last."

TV talkshow: 'You've heard the owl's version...we'll bring out the cat!'

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"Ever eat a bird?"

"I'm fascinated by body language."

Talking Dog.

Dog traps the postman.

"Another slander suit!"

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

'Now stay tuned for 'Hope - Myth or Reality', to be followed by 'Reality - Hope or Myth'.'

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"

"Actually I never loved you."

"What kind of tomorrow is it? — I don't know, when I wake up, it's already today."

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

'We should talk more.'

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

'I refuse to believe that Winkie was a terrorist.'

"Emotional breakdown! Call Oprah!"

"I started out eating homework. Now I shred documents."

"I majored in sheep with a minor in cat herding."

'I suggest you reconsider your approach to responsible dog breeding.'

"Yes, he does speak, but only on condition of anonymity."

'Sorry Binky, but there is no category for talking dogs.'

"He's a bird-dog."

"We begin the day hammering. Then there's 'Regis and Kathie Lee.' Then we do some more hammering, followed by lunch and 'Days of Our Lives,' more hammering, 'Oprah,' and, finally, home."

"I did it!"

"Your work's fine, it's your break time I want to talk to you about."

"I'm for universal coverage but not for cats."

'Sparky's amazing ability to speak to humans betrays him...'

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

'If provoked - his remarks can be scathing.'

I can't come in today. I haven't got chronic diarrhoea!

"Yeah, I tried beaver once too, but I didn't like the woody after-taste..."

Crufts "If you can read this you are too close"

"Well, if I had to guess -- I'd say it's undigested homework."