Animal Talk Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"I started out eating homework. Now I shred documents."

"Ever eat a bird?"

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

'It's a great film Pauline, I nearly milked myself laughing.'

"Another slander suit!"

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

"Give it up—Frisbee is your game."

"Actually I never loved you."

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

Their flirtation ground to a halt when she heard his dog-talking voice.

'I must admit that I've come a long way since I first heard the word speak!...'

'Oh, I'm not looking for Gold, I'm checking for bear-traps...'

"Yes, he does speak, but only on condition of anonymity."

'Sorry Binky, but there is no category for talking dogs.'

'Woof, woof, woof - but I'm paraphrasing.'

"BOL means Barking Out Loud."

"I could have been man's best friend but who needs the pressure."

"Your work's fine, it's your break time I want to talk to you about."

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

"Yeah, I tried beaver once too, but I didn't like the woody after-taste..."

"I'm for universal coverage but not for cats."

'If provoked - his remarks can be scathing.'

'Well, I know the moon is closer.'

'Look at that crazy cowboy, Butch, he's talking to his horse!'

'I pose as a concerned citizen, but actually I couldn't miss the golden marmoset if it did become extinct.'

"At the time of the incident, I was employed in the Dunbar house as a pet."

Catsplaining: Actually, Jerry, cats need to eat seven times a day to stay healthy

"That's life, Ellen. You're going to have a face like a ferret.''

"Here comes crazy old cousin Harriett, who scratches in all the wrong spots."

'I can forgive you, Nichole - but I can never forget.'

'What are you in for?'

"I'm dreaming of a white Christmas."

"You fellas' wanna' shoot some hoop instead?"

"Hey, a meat truck! Let’s go after it!" "Nah. My owner’s a lawyer. I only chase ambulances." "Oooh."