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"Actually I never loved you."

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

"Ever eat a bird?"

"I'm fascinated by body language."

'It's a great film Pauline, I nearly milked myself laughing.'

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

"Another slander suit!"

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

"Give it up—Frisbee is your game."

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

'We should talk more.'

'The cow mooed, the pig oinked, the chicken clucked, I baaed and then we adjourned.'

"I started out eating homework. Now I shred documents."

'Maybe I should abandon my crew and keep all the treasure for myself!'

'I must admit that I've come a long way since I first heard the word speak!...'

"Yes, he does speak, but only on condition of anonymity."

Barking as a Second Language.

"I did it!"

"BOL means Barking Out Loud."

"I could have been man's best friend but who needs the pressure."

"Your work's fine, it's your break time I want to talk to you about."

'If provoked - his remarks can be scathing.'

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

"Yeah, I tried beaver once too, but I didn't like the woody after-taste..."

"I'm for universal coverage but not for cats."

'I bet you think you have known interesting people before, not like me. I am truly fascinating.'

'Sparky's amazing ability to speak to humans betrays him...'

'Well, I know the moon is closer.'

"You taught me to speak, and now that I'm talking to you, you're all freaked out."

"The hard part was pulling my head off the wall and reattaching it to my body."

'Look at that crazy cowboy, Butch, he's talking to his horse!'

"At the time of the incident, I was employed in the Dunbar house as a pet."