Animal Rights Ponderer Gifts

"I stink... therefore, I am."

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

"Tallyho!"

"What the heck? The humans are washing in our waterhole with soap!"

"She wishes to range free!"

'Good evening! The debate over animal experiments continues...'

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

Yeah, I know what you're talking about: humans have an unhealthy interest in my horn too...

"Be kind"

'We don't want you poking around here any more!'

"I have no thumbs."

Feedback card for lions eating their prey.

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

'I'm from P.E.T.A.. Are you the one who called about animal-rights abuses?'

Save the unicorn.

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

"Who wrote this "Law of the Jungle" nonsense? It is highly biased in favour of predators!"

"Cloning is an imperfect science."

'Powdery stuff? Oh, that's egg substitute, from the Vegan lobby.'

"What do you suggest...the tuna fish or the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich?"

Japanese Whaling

Veggie Hall of Fame.

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

Of course your master calls you 'Man's best friend'. As your attorney I advise you to get it in writing.

Dogs all across town saw fit to teach their owners a little empathy...

"'Tis the story of a woeful refugee... ...whose plight has been forgotten. An admirable, amiable sort is he... but boy is he downtrodden. With courage of the kind you rarely see, he defended this land, when Redcoats invaded over land and sea, peck their knees and hands. And how did America repay this debt it owed its forest bird? Did you put our noble visage on the national seal as we would have preferred? No... You ate us. Just like the British did. I really think that it's the least you can do

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'