Animal Rights Enthusiast Gifts

'Ugh, traffic.'

"So I sued him, claiming the bark collar violated my free speech, won a bg settlement, and now I'm an animal rights lobbyist."

"Would you guys mind sitting this one out?"

"Save ALL animals, you b**tard!"

"It's not a terrible job considering I started in animal testing."

A hunter and wolf are stood in court.

"Do you know underground zoos will pay a fortune for black market penguins?"

"Here you go. I found a brand that doesn't test on animals."

Circle and square.

'Og doesn't believe in eating meat....

Baby Pigskins

'Don't you realise those collars are symbols of subservience and repression?'

'Ham escaped the slaughterhouse, but now a new problem arose - he discovered he had agoraphobia.'

'I thought it more humane to make him free-range.'

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

"Who wrote this "Law of the Jungle" nonsense? It is highly biased in favour of predators!"

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

"Tallyho!"

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

Yeah, I know what you're talking about: humans have an unhealthy interest in my horn too...

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

"What the heck? The humans are washing in our waterhole with soap!"

"I have no thumbs."

'We don't want you poking around here any more!'

"Be kind"

Feedback card for lions eating their prey.

"She wishes to range free!"

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.