Animal Manager T-Shirts

Rancher builds fence around angry bull.

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"In every situation, an executive has to decide whether to lead by consensus, charisma or cattle prod. Trust me... it's not always this easy!"

'Rex! Have you been counting the sheep again?'

'I heard him mention your name, what does neutered, mean?'

A dog catcher catching a dog catching a cat catching a bird catching a fly.

Wolf Reintroduction.

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

"I ventured into a garden this morning and was caught by a snake catcher, then relocated here. Where am I? Can you help me find my family again?"

"Okay, now we're too domesticated."

A relevant sign for the shopkeeper's predicament.

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

'His jaw got stuck when he tried to fetch the Sunday paper!'

'The toughest thing about a mixed practice is keeping your fingernails clean.'

"We should have taken a eweber."

A recurring crisis at the Farkinski farm

'No, I own the cattle. He's the vet!'

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

Wildlife Management.

"Okay, okay - I'll keep my day job!"

'Look, when you made an appointment for me to treat a rattlesnake bite,...

"Raising free-range chickens is the easy part. The hard part is the drive to Abilene."

"Maybe some of us don't want to give ourselves a round of applause for agreeing to restore the delicate balance of our ecosystem."

'Hello? Animal control?'

The Lion Tamer.