Animal Dermatologist Pillows

'I'll be glad to discuss Pal's itchy skin in my office tomorrow morning, Mrs. Allan!'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

We did a biopsy on the mole we removed, and it turns out it was just an old piece of chocolate.

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

"Congratulations! It's a bitch!"

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

PROBLEM AREAS

'Well, Mr. 'I don't need any sunblock', what have you got to say for yourself now?'

'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'

Pop Culture for Teens

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

S.P.F. 1,000

'If it doesn't itch, why worry?'

'Apply that ointment as directed and call me if the growth does not reduce or it starts to talk.'

'No.... My cat doesn't like being given pills either...'

"Sure I used drugs when I was your age, but they were all prescribed for acne."

"Well, what number sunscreen are you using?"

Desert Dermatologist

Dermatologist reading a 'Journal of Itchcraft'.

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

"The biopsy on your mole came back negative, which is positive, which is good."

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

'I wonder how long he's been a vet?'

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

'You do Botox?'

'Botox...'

'As pizza maker, maybe a skin care products site isn't the best idea for an affiliate site.'

"What you have is what we call Cactunitus. It's when your skin is so dry you start to morph into a cactus."

'You've got dry scalp.'

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'