Animal Assistance Awareness Gifts

Blind man walking a tortoise.

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

A crowd of happy pet owners.

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

Brian was very proud of his dog.

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

Support group for sheep.

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

dog vs UFO...

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

I'm not saying I'm not a hound dog. I'm saying I'm not nothing but a hound dog.

Armstrong, the only doctor covered in the new health plan you got me is a veterinarian! Beats no coverage. Yeah, if you're a parakeet. You're so cheap. You don't value me at all. You ingrate. I didn't have to give you health benefits. Lots of employers don't cover their animals. You mean workers. Stop your barking.

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

The Golfing Accident

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."