Animal Altruist Gifts

"This is exactly why I oppose free hand-outs."

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

"Look out, Luke Grasswalker! Irascibility leads to the dark side of the force. . . right into a hamburger bun."

'The environment people only worry about endangered species, not endangered individuals.'

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

"As an expert in loyalty, Fido will create an emotional bond with each customer."

'Oh yeah, ths boss is going to love the new hire.'

'Fish store' 'All our products are dolphin-safe, whale-safe, turtle-safe, seahorse-safe.'

Pets: This animal has not been tested on products.

Due to public pressure international wildlife groups give the Canada goose the official status of 'annoying.'

'This is not what I expected when you said we were going to help an endangered species...'

A smiling badger

'If whales are so intelligent, why do they swim near Japan?'

My master abandoned me because I had more 'likes' than he does. Please help.

"Too bad for you that the judge rules in favor of dogs playing in varsity sorts."

"Miss Sadie did remember several pets in her will."

"So anyway, I found a worm on the path the other day and carried it to safety. Then I hear: 'Hey! I was heading the other way!"

"It's funny...back when I first signed up to 'Adopt an Endangered Manatee', I thought they just wanted me to send money. Instead, little Julia came along and changed my life forever."

Man Diverts the Hunt...and hides the fox!

Angry Bulls about to try out their version of Butchering on an unsuspecting Butcher

St. Agnes Catholic Church: Meatless Friday Lenten Dinner 6 PM.

Another Cultured Meat Experiment Ends in Failure.

"I haven't been fond of humans since one of them coined the phrase, 'in the soup'."

"Okay, we've donated to the Food Bank, Feed the Hungry, Food for Life, Hunger Helpers, Starving World, Second Helpings. . . is anyone else getting hungry?"

'Hello, Amnesty International?'

'May I strongly suggest the soy burger?'

'I wanted to hear the pita pata of tiny feet so he bought me a hamster.'

"They think it's easy being the bleedin' bluebird of happiness!"

On the red carpet

Deforestation