Animal Ethics Enthusiast Gifts

'you've been circling three days, and your prey won't die - what's your position, ethically speaking?'

'Do you know what a chimp costs these days?'

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"I have no thumbs."

'We don't want you poking around here any more!'

"Be kind"

Yeah, I know what you're talking about: humans have an unhealthy interest in my horn too...

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

"Who wrote this "Law of the Jungle" nonsense? It is highly biased in favour of predators!"

"Cloning is an imperfect science."

Save the unicorn.

"What do you suggest...the tuna fish or the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich?"

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

"'Tis the story of a woeful refugee... ...whose plight has been forgotten. An admirable, amiable sort is he... but boy is he downtrodden. With courage of the kind you rarely see, he defended this land, when Redcoats invaded over land and sea, peck their knees and hands. And how did America repay this debt it owed its forest bird? Did you put our noble visage on the national seal as we would have preferred? No... You ate us. Just like the British did. I really think that it's the least you can do

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

'I had no idea would be a choice.'

'I don't trust humans: Some times, they throw us bread, some other times, they shoot at us!'

Pick Your Own Baby Lamb Chop

'You see son, it's jobs like these that give us a bad name...'

'I can't recommend the beef.'

A boy who loves cows/burgers

'I got a birdie, an eagle, and a lawsuit from animal rights activists.'

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

"If anything else, it beats bending over!"

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

'It's a 'Free Willy From Hollywood' petition: Would you please sign it...'

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."