Angelic Wit Gifts

"First I was prematurely gray. Now I'm prematurely dead."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

'T.M.I.F.'

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

An amplified harp

'The company was quite generous. They gave me a whole day off for the funeral.'

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

"It's your final warning...Quit playing the 'Beverly Hillbillies' theme song"

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

'I would have been here sooner, if not for a wonderful, caring, competent doctor.'

"I still hate you."

"Say what you like about Hell, at least they have solid floors."

"So much for eternal rest."

"Well. . . the cost of living was getting too high, so. . ."

'How nice! -- They're making a ten-part miniseries about the Bible!'

"But you're paper trained and we don't have any newspapers or newspaper people."

"But don't bother making up a schedule for all those projects. I've got all the time in the world now."

Late Night TV

'Let's see...yes, there is a wing upgrade for a soul patch.'

Fat angel eating halo like doughnut

Showering angel has water bouncing off her halo.

"I guess they really are permanent."

"Are you sure these comment cards are anonymous?"

"Man, what I wouldn't do for some Chinese take-out."

'But how did you lose your harp?'

"Yup. This is heaven. Free beer and unlimited peanuts."

'Gee, I never expected to find this problem here too!'

"Look, I know you think you've got the stuff, but I'm telling you: walk God."

"I couldn't take it with me, so I came back."

"Why corona? I thought they were getting a bit too cocky."

"Don't feed them! It makes them dependent."

"Care to try the dip? It's posthummus."

An angel looks at a news box containing the "International Herald Tribune".