Angelic Narrator Gifts

You Are Entering God's Country. A Pearly-Gated Community.

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"All we have left is standing room only."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

Halo Frisbee.

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

"I was a primary school teacher. What did you do?"

Angel playing music

"You think it's tough down there?"

"I know, boy—I miss the smoked salmon at Zabar's, too."

"Not that it's any of your business, but no, I wasn't kicked out! We had creative differences, that's all!"

Supply was out of harps.

"If it isn't E mc2!"

"The last thing I remember is hearing the doctor say oops!"

Magazine Stand at the Pearly Gates

Fat angel eating halo like doughnut

"I can't. You told him he could date after you came here."

"Well, to be honest, I try to avoid reunions - my first four husbands are here."

"Ready? It's your bloopers tape."

'The Christ Child'

Library In Heaven Stocks The Bible And Only The Bible

Spring Break!

"When you testify, Marty, tell the truth and let the lawyers go to hell."

Yeah, last words are like snappy comeback --- You always think of the best ones after it's too late!

'Now THERE'S a friendship I've never quite understood. That's Ludwig van Beethoven on the left, with Harvey Fernquist, the inventor of telephone 'hold' music!'

"I loved the good old days, …. 'better dead than red'."

Angels waiting at baggage reclaim for their harps.

Ad Meeting With God.

"I get great reception this way."

"Somehow I thought we'd be done with all that."

'I'm afraid our records show that you still have two DVD's checked out.'

Insurance agents in Heaven.

"Oh them, They're contrarians."

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

Bouncer picks out good-looking woman in queue for heaven. Man says: 'This, I did not expect.'