Angelic Chuckler Pillows

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

"Sorry, we first have to do a background check."

An amplified harp

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

'I'm all tired out from creating - let's just use NATURAL selection from now on.'

"Actually, they all look alike to me."

'I would have been here sooner, if not for a wonderful, caring, competent doctor.'

'How nice! -- They're making a ten-part miniseries about the Bible!'

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

'Let us now turn to the Gospel According to St. Matthew for today's sob story.'

"I'll pass on reincarnation. I'm glad that I don't live in the age of Trump!"

"Say what you like about Hell, at least they have solid floors."

"So much for eternal rest."

"But you're paper trained and we don't have any newspapers or newspaper people."

Various Birds of Pray.

Quick Confessional Box - 8 sins or less.

"Hey, this is a good bit- did I say that?"

Hey diddle, diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow finally landed on the moon.

Fat angel eating halo like doughnut

'They come down here to smoke.'

"But don't bother making up a schedule for all those projects. I've got all the time in the world now."

"Well...this constant badness is just sooo wearisome...."

'Everyone's a stand-up comic these days.'

New arrival in Heaven sees a Manna vending machine.

Late Night TV

'Let's see...yes, there is a wing upgrade for a soul patch.'

"Wow, that thing is bright! Glad we wore our sunglasses!"