Ancient Scholar Pillows

'Exams were harder before the Renaissance.'

The first car accident.

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

Those Were The Days

"We've been wandering in the desert for forty years. But he's a man—would he ever ask directions?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"I'm really gonna miss Rome."

'I'm calling this a plate and I already have service for six. Six more and I can invent the dinner party.'

"Oog creates fire and all you can come up with is that silly round thing!"

Ancient Greek setting. Man at desk writing on scroll says: 'Yes, they're draconian measures ??" but then, I am Draco.'

"This is what I use for social media."

'Another invention? -- You are SUCH a geek!'

We apologise for the disruption to your evolution...

'Hey! -- what have you done with my invention?'

"I don't know. I'm something of a technophobe."

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

"Grog understand supply and demand."

Theodore Roosevelt.

'This thing is dangerous! -- invent fire and burn it up!'

'See? I've got a rock AND a stick! -- I've invented MULTITASKING!'

"It says God created heaven and earth, then there was light. Why didn't He do it the other way round, when He could see what He was doing?"

'I was close to a breakthrough when the grant money ran out.'

"I'm waiting for them to work out the bugs first,"

Introducing Ed, The Nephew of God.

Sign by school library reads: 'Passing Lane'

"You've spent the last 20 years in college. what made you stop hiding from the real world?"

'It's a rock made of plastic.'

'Look, fire is fire - Why try to develop theories about it?'

''Intelligent design'? -- Why, those patronizing little twerps!'

"I can't take another memoir."