Ancient Scholar Gifts

'Exams were harder before the Renaissance.'

The first car accident.

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

Those Were The Days

"We've been wandering in the desert for forty years. But he's a man—would he ever ask directions?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

I just made up that part. It should really throw people for a loop if they find this place thousands of years from now!

Oog has invented the organization chart.

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

'I'm calling this a plate and I already have service for six. Six more and I can invent the dinner party.'

"I'm really gonna miss Rome."

Ancient Greek setting. Man at desk writing on scroll says: 'Yes, they're draconian measures ??" but then, I am Draco.'

"Oog creates fire and all you can come up with is that silly round thing!"

'Another invention? -- You are SUCH a geek!'

"This is what I use for social media."

'Hey! -- what have you done with my invention?'

We apologise for the disruption to your evolution...

"I don't know. I'm something of a technophobe."

"Grog understand supply and demand."

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

Theodore Roosevelt.

'See? I've got a rock AND a stick! -- I've invented MULTITASKING!'

"It says God created heaven and earth, then there was light. Why didn't He do it the other way round, when He could see what He was doing?"

'This thing is dangerous! -- invent fire and burn it up!'

'I was close to a breakthrough when the grant money ran out.'

"I'm waiting for them to work out the bugs first,"

Introducing Ed, The Nephew of God.

'Look, fire is fire - Why try to develop theories about it?'

Sign by school library reads: 'Passing Lane'

'It's a rock made of plastic.'

"You've spent the last 20 years in college. what made you stop hiding from the real world?"

''Intelligent design'? -- Why, those patronizing little twerps!'

"I can't take another memoir."