Ancient Rome Buff Pillows

"It's true, Caesar. Rome is declining, but I expect it to pick up in the next quarter."

Centurion in a Shower

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Knight Golfing

Theorbo

Cavemen Romantic Gesture

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

"Our focus group will butcher your focus group."

"Where do you think we are in the food chain right now?"

Missing You.

Ten Commandments

May your Christmas be full of harmony

'Sigh! So that's what love is all about...'

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

What do you think about this "too big to fail" stuff?

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

"Hendrickje, I feel another self-portrait coming on. Bring in the funny hats."

"Of course you'll study Latin. How else will you learn the names of your dinosaur friends."

Knights of the Square Table.

"Ancient Aztec shaman-kings predicted a coming together of all the cultures of the world, creating a new enlightenment for human beings."

The simultaneous development of dining and pomposity.

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."

'You can't recuse yourself from a war!'

"You fools! That's not the boiling oil, that's my beef casserole!"

A caveman kid sees his ancestor in a museum exhibit

"It's a giant banana but is it an organic giant banana?"

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Concerto, Number One, first movement."

"One of you go see who's at the door."

'There he goes over the bag limit again!'

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

"With a little luck he'll be a benevolent teenager."

"This is the first time you've ever planned a moat, I'm guessing?"

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

'Another invention? -- You are SUCH a geek!'