Ancient Humor Lover Pillows

"No, you may not cut in!"

"In two million years from now people like me will still be very rich tanks to idiots like you!"

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

Jurassic Parking Lot

The Trojan Beagle.

As the world emerges from the last ice age Ug & Og discuss a historic agreement to reduce CO2 emissions from woolly mammoth barbecues.

This side is the gag reel.

"I've considered portraiture, but everyone is so ugly."

'The village's oldest inhabitant? We did have one, but he died.'

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Moscow 1917

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

"Is it free-range?"

'Gentlemen, invent your engines.'

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with prostate!'

"I gotta flat. Can you get the spear out of the trunk."

"Google Earth must have a defective camera. There's a big red spot above our location."

Peter Cook

"Hey Arthur, check it out, a shooting star. That's a sure sign of luck, my friend."

'Do you mind if I share your post on my wall?'

'They're called 'numbers' -- Now we can have public opinion polls!'

"Ooops is a bit of an understatement, don't you think Cardigan?"

'I'll wait for Harold one more year. He hasn't crossed the finish line yet from the 1932 Olympic's marathon.'

The Enemy

"Gorg, you've got to let yourself evolve!"

"Has he had all his shots"

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

"This is what I use for social media."

"All I need now is a trainer!"

'I just invented business!'

"I bought a fake rock to cover up this ugly rock."

"I promise you. One day granite kitchens will be the in thing."