Alternative Ingredients Enthusiast T-Shirts

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

But is it organic?

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

See you at the farmers market!

At the market

Eco Princess

Vegetarian Birds

'Perfect. Do you deliver?'

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

'With these alternative fertility treatments you never quite know how things turn out,'

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

'You're still keen on organic gardening then!'

'Who says you're not genetically manipulated?'

'Our chickens are a real 'come back' story: raised organic, they hooked up with some seedy fowl, but then, thankfully, were saved by massive doses of antibiotics.'

"Was there a photo in the recipe book? I'd love to see what it's meant to look like."

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

'I never knew baking was such a violent activity. You have to beat the eggs, whip the cream, and mash the nuts.'

"You want organic, we'll make it organic."

"It's a giant banana but is it an organic giant banana?"

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

"I thought I'd give Western medicine one more chance."

'What do you have that hasn't been cloned?'

"Oh, that poor thing."

Sawdust.

Let's all go to a farmer's market.

'We thank you for this food and ask you to protect us from pesticides, additives and preservatives.'

Snow White to witch: 'You're sure it's organic?'

'Ethical farm - none of our produce goes to fast food outlets'.

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."

The sword in the all-natural impossible-to-stir peanut butter.