Alternative Diet Explorer Gifts

Je-Hereford's Witnesses

"My veganism begins and ends with eating insects."

Vegetarian Birds

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

"I've been on a diet for 5 weeks and can safely tell you that I've lost 5 weeks."

"I've tried 5 diets and haven't lost a pound. Maybe I shouldn't try them all at the same time."

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

Nutritional Supplements.

Odd Spas

"Whatever diet they're on, tell them what they ordered is PERFECT for them."

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

The First Vegetarians.

"Cardiac day patients?"

'My guru thinks you're nuts.'

'The good news is that our latest diet products work fabulously well. The bad news is that we haven't got any customers any more!'

"So does this Flamingo diet have any side effects?"

Roger couldn't understand why his diet wasn't working.

"We've gone glutton-free."

"I only invest in alternative meat products, so I reject the terms 'Bull' and 'Bear'."

"Hey guys, I'm thinking about going vegetarian."

"It may not be the lowest cal, but it's low enough cal for me."

"I'm thinking of switching to an all vegan diet...based on carrots...mainly carrots..."

'I know why Max has suddenly turned vegetarian: His new girlfriend is a Fruit-Bat...'

I find that I can cut back on calories if I use only one chopstick.

'It's time for drastic measures - I'm taking you off food and putting you on chew toys.'

"My doctor suggested I get less fat in my diet."

'He's saying 'Enough bananas - I'm also a carnivore'.'

"What've you got that's good for vegans?"

It was time to start the lockdown diet.

Go Veggie...

'It's not our wine list. It's a list of gastroenterologists.'

Fast food trap.