Allergy Season Warriors Gifts

"Aaaaa....Chooo!"

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

Allergy Information: May contain traces of nuts, soya, child bones.

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

"Is it just me, or is the pollen particularly bad this year?"

"I can't have anything that's a food."

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

'Oh yeah, ths boss is going to love the new hire.'

"How many more times, you've got hayfever, so no, you can't have any cannabis oil."

Protecting Nature

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

"It's almost flu season! Stay indoors! Touch no one!"

"The surgery went well. You'll be issued a 'Contains No Nuts' card upon discharge."

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

"I was NOT huffing and puffing - it's just allergies."

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

The Inverted Nose: Genetic engineering's answer to the sniffles.

"How am I? I'm just trying to et over the flu in time for allergy season."

"You can domesticate it, but only if it's hypoallergenic."

"Yeah, it's a drag, but the only flight I could get was a red-eye."

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

'I stopped to smell the flowers. Where's my inhaler?'

'If that's true, if you've really done it, I can say unequivocally, that is indeed...Nothing to sneeze at!'

Mom! Of course I know it's spring outside! Look at all the allergy commericals!

"The gluten's back. And it's pissed."

'Unfortunately, Mr.Beckons, your son Dean is very allergic to grass. . .'

"Dad's allergies kicked in during out special 'man to man' walk...so I learned all about the birds and the sneeze."

"Well, my wife is lactose-maltose-dextrose-sucrose-cellulose intolerant, which means I can't even hand her an empty box of candy."

'Look - there's the first swallow of summer.'

"Y' know, a GOOD host would provide a lactose-free option!"

'I have allergies, so before I can eat you, I need to know if you contain traces of nuts...'

"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, pollen to pollen, mold to mold..." "He was allergic to everything."