Allergy Investigator Gifts

"I think I have allergies to something in this room."

'That's ridiculous! Who ever heard of a dog with hives?'

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

"Garden variety allergies."

Viral Pathology Center (janitor finding three dead bodies)

'Mum, it's not fair: The principal said I was not allowed to take nuts to school anymore...'

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

'Let me guess, you're 'Sneezy'.'

'Here's an interesting article. 'Cold or Seasonal Allergy?''

'Biggest damn virus I've ever seen!'

'I just came back from the allergist. I'm allergic to life.'

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

'Are you a squirrel? I have a serious nut allergy!'

An allergist sneezing

Man sneezes and blows flowers out of painting.

'You see, I'm allergic to dog dander....'

Oh, oh... I detect traces of tree nuts... where's my epipen?

'You Have a food allergy. Even worse it's to 'O' type!'

"Can you test for broccoli and brussels sprouts too?"

"Yes, I have allergies! Hundreds! Because my crazy mother kept me in a germ-free house with no pets and I developed zero immunities!"

"I just love the reactions I get every day when I come to work."

"The good news is, the side effects of your nut allergy aren't really dangerous."

'Well, this is a first- you seem to be allergic to distilled water.'

"Your tests are back. You're allergic to tissues."

'I'm afraid you're allergic to nuts!'

'I'm afraid you're allergic to micro chips.'

'I'm so relieved Doc: It would have been a tragedy if he had had a peanut allergy...'

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

'I think I may be lactose intolerant.'