Allergy Enthusiast Gifts

"I've been wanting you two to meet. You both have the same seasonal allergies."

"Garden variety allergies."

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

"He has a terrible peanut elegy."

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

Allergy Information: May contain traces of nuts, soya, child bones.

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

'Mum, it's not fair: The principal said I was not allowed to take nuts to school anymore...'

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

"I can't have anything that's a food."

'I just came back from the allergist. I'm allergic to life.'

"How many more times, you've got hayfever, so no, you can't have any cannabis oil."

'Oh yeah, ths boss is going to love the new hire.'

Man sneezes and blows flowers out of painting.

'You see, I'm allergic to dog dander....'

'You Have a food allergy. Even worse it's to 'O' type!'

Protecting Nature

"The surgery went well. You'll be issued a 'Contains No Nuts' card upon discharge."

"I just love the reactions I get every day when I come to work."

"The tests came back positive. You're H2O intolerant."

"Yeah, it's a drag, but the only flight I could get was a red-eye."

'Well, this is a first- you seem to be allergic to distilled water.'

The Inverted Nose: Genetic engineering's answer to the sniffles.

"How could they possibly know it's gluten-free, low gi. . . ?"

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

"So, little Andy is a lawyer now!"

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

"None of our items are gluten-free, but they are prepared by people who are."

'If that's true, if you've really done it, I can say unequivocally, that is indeed...Nothing to sneeze at!'

"The gluten's back. And it's pissed."

'Unfortunately, Mr.Beckons, your son Dean is very allergic to grass. . .'

"Oh, oh...I detect traces of tree nuts...where's my epipen?"