Alien Curator T-Shirts

"I hate to blow the place up, but it's way out of compliance with Galactic standards."

Check out the nice crawdads I have in the bait bucket, George.

Outer Space Outsourcing

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

"Look what I found, dad!"

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"Houston, we have a problem."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

"The space aliens who abducted me wanted to know what it was like to be loved...I wasted no time."

"Would you relax? They never look up."

Save Our Universe

Caption contest. After last year's 3,000 entries, we're doing it again! Visit Speedbump.com for info and send your entries to speedbumpcomic@comcast.net.

'I suppose you'll use this as an excuse for turning in your homework in late again.'

Friends and enemies of the Earth.

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

'Excuse me could you please direct me to the nearest toilet?'

"I understand this diner has quite a reputation."

'It's good to be here. We're having economic problems where we come from.'

dog vs UFO...

'You caught it, you gut it!'

Sci-Fi Museum. New Exhibit. H.G. Wells War of the Worlds. In 1938, Orson Welles broadcast "War of the Worlds," a radio drama about aliens from Mars invading earth. The radio drama was presented as a series of fake news reports about devastation caused by the invading aliens. Many listeners turned in to the program mid-roadcast and thought the news reports were real. Widespread panic ensued. Wow! Orson Welles caused all that panic with a radio program. Just imagine what he could have don

How am I abducting?

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

"If you lied about where you are from, what else have you lied about?"

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"The inhabitants of Pluto today declared Earth not a planet..."

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

"They look like pickles."

"How many darn burritos did you eat?"

"Before vaporizing this one, we need to file an environmental impact report."