Alaskan Dreamer T-Shirts

'I don't get it. They told me to serve merlot at room temperature.'

Alaska The Last Frontier

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

New Guy.

'I was just playing rodeo and breaking horses.'

What else is there to wish for?

Plan to Split California into Six States Proposed....

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

'I imagine you'll be asking for a full refund.'

'Do you know the way to San Jose without breaking into a Bacharach number?'

'I have a feeling one day when he grows up he'll be an artist of some kind.'

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

"I need a holiday that guarantees perfect weather, good beaches and romance!"

"Follow that dream!" (man boarding taxi)

'Okay, on the count of three we fight back. One. . . Two. . .'

"I'm sad to hear everybody lived happily ever after. That means no sequels to this story."

California Gold...field of poppies with matching border

A boy dressed as a cowboy riding a stick horse encounters a stick with a cow's skull at the end lying on the ground.

"I've always wanted to live on a lake so I can go boating and fishing. Since we don't live on a lake, I thought I'd make my own."

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

The world's most unemployable family

The Idea of America.

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

"As night falls, You return to claim what isn't yours. . . come at me, sea devil!!!"

"I like it, honey ... it speaks to what a waste of time your MFA was."

DACA

"One day she'll be a wonderful architect."

"Great money scenes!"

"Have you give any thought to my suggestion about a sculpture that's just a chubby kid constantly peeing."

Budgetmageddon

"But honey. . . he's just not our kind!"

Like many kids, Bobby had an imaginary friend. Unfortunately for Bobby, he was a critic.

Rainbow/Horizon