Air Quality Specialist Gifts

Scientist taking air quality reading on roof with canary wearing gas mask.

"Doc! The particulate matter readings are spiking!"

Casino's new air filtration system is way too strong.

Air freshener - pollution.

Polluted geese

Man using to much bug spray

"Isn't it great to get out of the kitchen and cook in the fresh air!"

"We only got up to three 'whys' and a 'what the hell'."

"We're developing a plan to fix this."

Barbecue raises a cloud of smoke; birds and squirrel in tree above wear gas masks.

Bottled water straight from the Potomac, Congo and Ganges. Bottled waters that never had much market share.

Fumes from furniture

"Some day, son, all this will be yours. Sorry."

Ofwat Sewage Scrutiny

Party ville Trick Birthday Candles: Quality Control Department.,

'Due to budget cutbacks we are combining our annual employee dinner with The Seven Basic Quality Control Tools Training.'

"We're having a lot of trouble with this model, sir - it's lasting indefinitely."

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

Mine problems

"Well TECHNICALLY he might be DEAD, but accordinh to the hospital's new patient satisfaction metrics he's pretty damned pleased about it."

"It floated. I want my money back."

Complaints clerk to consumer: A hair in your TV dinner? Maybe it belongs to a celebrity!

"And here is the quality control department for our deviled eggs."

Impartial Testing: "Eeny, meeny, money, moe..."

"Well, our toxic wastes are ten times more harmful thinner hazardous wastes."

"Could you spare a few minutes to give some feedback on your death experience?"

Quality Contorl.

Doll line: Quality Control - Too Creepy.

Benchmark

'They're doing their tests now?

'The scary part is, he's in charge of quality control.'

"...and into each box, we now put a tiny amount of antidote to counteract all the additives."

'Half-empty...half-full, but probably polluted.'

Harry Potter toy manufacturer.

'Don't slam the door so hard.'