Agricultural Researcher Gifts

"Good evening we would like to talk to you about genetically modified crops."

I can't believe it's not food!

'Bloody Global Warming!'

'Gene Pool'

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

'At last, some good news about farming.'

Agriculture Research Lab. I've come up with an onion that can be made into fuel ... I call it the "gas leek"!

Genetics Lab. You developed a dwarf cow? I call it "mini-moo"!

'We have an agreement with the Dept. of Agriculture to accelerate some grapes, lemons and hazelnuts.'

'Funny you should mention that - I happen to be involved in a joint research project with the Department of Agriculture for the express purpose of getting blood from a turnip.'

'We're testing a new slaughter method - first, we tell the pigs they're stockholders. Then, we give them a financial paper!'

'This has taken YEARS of genetic research!'

'STOP! You're injecting the wrong GMO gene!'

The History of GM Food

Methane capture and storage.

"If we can make a cabbage smarter, imagine what we can do with other food!"

The Jeopardy of Progress

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'Life is great' down on the farm.

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

View to the Future

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

'Yeah, I'm sorry to break it to you bud, that eating grass thing is a myth!'

Cow's straw

"It's the Environment's Agency's new H.Q."

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

I fart more than that!

GMOs: The Next Generation

HELLth Food Sprouts

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….