Agri-detective T-Shirts

"CSI Tulsa"

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

Garden.

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

"These are Fzjhyg's sales figures for the month? I can run crop circles round him."

'True it does have small flowers but through the microscope its exquisite.'

"Mother! How? Wait — where’s Dad?!"

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'

Getting Rid of the Cure

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

"Well, we can kiss being free-range goodbye."

"There's a house-plant round here somewhere."

"We know you boosted that milk truck!" "Admit it or we'll take a bite outta you!"

Which is the genetically modified corn?"

Is Gypsie Moth in YOUR Garden? Signs to look for...

"Are your chickens raised without the use of growth hormones?"

"What happened to what cat?"

'First Lady Lettuce goes missing...'

Do they have to grow frozen vegetables in the winter?

"You arrive early, You work hard, You stay focused. What's your game?"

Contaminated eggs? No problem at all!

"You can stop straining. I read the message wrong. It's 'crop' circle...my bad sorry."

'Ha! I knew they were just little trees!'

My first dead gnome!

"Today the CIA investigated the FBI's investigation of the IRS' investigation of Trump."

'Heaven welcomes botanists, we've millions of extinct plants that need classifying!'

"This banana I bought yesterday, when I peeled it it was empty!"

'I'll do anything to find water in this drought.'

"Genetically modified crops are more resilient against climate change."

Midnight in the Vegetable Garden of Good and Evil.

"These beans that Jack planted...can we assume they were genetically modified?"

'To tell you the truth I don't what it is.'

"I'm poison oak. I'm pretty sure I'm poison oak.... Or is that poison oak?"

Is Gypsy Moth in Your Garden?