Bio-detective T-Shirts

'Look at this! These little critters are not asexual after all.'

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

Family DNA

'Mom! This high resolution screen makes it seem like you're really outdoors!'

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

'As everyone knows, scientists are at their peaks early in their careers.'

'True it does have small flowers but through the microscope its exquisite.'

"Mother! How? Wait — where’s Dad?!"

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

"Please accept the apologies of this court. You're free to go now, and, by the way, here's your DNA back."

'DNA...nature's bar code.'

These young people need everything spelled out to them! I miss the old days, when a wink was a wink, and a nod was a nod.

'ADN'

A caveman kid sees his ancestor in a museum exhibit

Getting Rid of the Cure

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

'Apparently my DNA had guilt written all over it.'

Recombinant DNA Lab. To-da! The palindromedary!

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of "CSI: Miami" to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45pm? The Youtube generation grows up fast.

Jerk Gene

"Say, do you have time between all that DNA research to invent a non-smelly sock."

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

How did life begin? Image shows a strand of dna in the form of a question mark (with a single cell as the dot, floating in water or primeval soup). The image also refers to life beyond the earth, with the cell-like blobs resembling galaxies in outer space

"Ever killed a man?"

"I've devised a new paternity test, or as I call it, a pop quiz."

'This changes everything -- I found a loophole in the genetic code!'

"My conclusion that he lied was based on his body language, his polygraph results, and the complete implausibility of his story."

"There's a house-plant round here somewhere."

"I'm home, with all my DNA."

The dna double helix, with a human family taking the place of the dna rungs (or bases), illustrating genetic inheritance within the family

"We think we've found the murder weapon Sir"

DNA doctor

Medical Lab. Ernie, we call it a "paternity test," not a "pop quiz."