Age-defying Gardener T-Shirts

"I'm 92 years old, Larry ... why in the heck would I plant perennials?!"

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

An Unexpected Guest.

'I had a wonderful garden last year. Bark beetles, aphids, mealy worms, thripes, wax seal, gray mold, and grubs!'

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Planting seeds in garden - broad beans and jelly beans.

'The attendant is very good. I tip him the occasional sparrow.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

'I'm in the amusingly shaped vegetables department.'

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

'And if you squeeze snapdragons just like this, it sort of looks like they're biting something.'

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

Planting Bird Seed.

City Zoo: 'Try our exotic composts in your garden.'

Executive grows martinis in his garden.

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.

Hydroponic Gardening

Wet weather footwear - shoes that are shaped like boats.

'You've never forgotten that Elsie Turner, have you George!'

"I stopped singing to my plants! I've never had one say 'shaddup!' before!"

'What on earth made you think of growing water melons in the bath Henry?'

'This one here would probably be best for you; It prefers partial shade, needs little watering and grows best in esoteric single-panel cartoons.'

'Sewer farm - 100% organic'

'Well Miss Pearson, this flood resistant GM Maize you've developed is pure genius. Giving it gills was a masterstroke'

Hell's Allotment Holders.

Clown watering his flowers.

Football fan

Bonsai farms: 'We started growing normal trees, but it didn't work out!'

Pyramid Garden

Watering a plant in the rain.

Man with a sunflower head watering flowers with human faces.

'I borrowed Timmy's model plane to crop dust the garden.'

Woman Planting Flowers in her Snow Covered Garden.