Afterlife Tech Enthusiast T-Shirts

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

"Before I commit. . . what's the wi-fi like?"

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

Devil's food cake/Angel's food cake. Delivery mix-up.

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Surgery up here is free!"

"All we have left is standing room only."

"It's true: no more burpees."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

The Gospel According To Jane Brody"Orange, come in. Apple, come in. Hey you, frankfurter, hold it right there."

'We've re-branded.'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

The Reaper's Arms

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

"Really? That's the only game in this house?"

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

Get out of the way, Harold - I'm trying to talk to Cuddles.

'Look man, no wings!'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

Orientation: Welcome to Hell

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

Going Down?

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

"Must we have ten minutes blasphemy every night?"