Afterlife Comedians Pillows

'Well yes. I guess it makes you look taller.'

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

"You run into a window, too?"

"I must have pressed the wrong button."

"Did you really think you were getting in here?"

'Ha! You moron! How did you manage to use all nine of your lives at once?'

"I still maintain an online presence."

"I'll have whatever they're having."

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

Special Place in Hell...

'Second fastest gun in the west.'

"Johnson's selling ad space in the tunnel of light."

"Ready? It's your bloopers tape."

Bob landed in Hell. And to make matters worse, they lost his luggage.

I'm afraid of heights.

"Hey you!. . . Get off of my cloud!"

Heaven on the Phone to Hell - 'We've got Sky.'

An anarchist angel wearing his halo as a hoop earring,

"Of course we have unlimited data..."

'I couldn't get the cap off the prescription bottle. What did you die of?'

"Soul patch. What do you think?"

"Don't you hate that? Now I think of the perfect last words!"

'I didn't know Heaven had another entrance?'

"Murchison is still in denial."

'I led a long and happy life. Twenty business cycles.'

'Frankly, your credit score concerns me.'

Mourning break.

'That was Larry...always trying to improve himself.'

The late Cretaceous period.

"All right. You can keep it as long as you're on hold, but then you have to turn it in."

'Yeah, I tried that once.'

'You must be new here. Most of us just hang around in our bathrobes'

'You'll need a username and password to enter...'

Boy, you were this close to getting in until I checked these photos of you on Facebook.