Afterlife Humor Fans Pillows

"All right. You can keep it as long as you're on hold, but then you have to turn it in."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Surgery up here is free!"

"All we have left is standing room only."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

"You run into a window, too?"

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

"I must have pressed the wrong button."

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

"I was a primary school teacher. What did you do?"

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'

A Male Angel throwing his Halo as a Frisbee for his Dog to catch.

"Oh nooo, we can't skip church. Why, we'll just sleep when we're dead!"

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"Did you really think you were getting in here?"

"As we're here for eternity, I expected at least a television."

Gates of heaven

"Yes, this is heaven - but we need some source of funding, too."

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

'Can't talk now, I'm just going into a tunnel.'

'Ha! You moron! How did you manage to use all nine of your lives at once?'

'Hold on, pal! Who's in control of the narrative here?'

Heaven

"No, you're going to hell - but you're welcome to check out the gift shop."

Post-psychoanalysis

"You get a white robe, a halo, wings, and of course, free WIFI."

'Listen, if they didn't have alcohol in heaven, it wouldn't be heaven!'

Life on cloud 8

Door sign states: Reincarnation studies Come again ... and again.

"Just be happy you're getting in, worry about your hair later."