Aesop Fan Pillows

"Why would I sign up for a marathon? Well, Coubertin said it best: "the most important thing is not to win, but to take part"..."

"It's the dawn of a new era"

"Congratulations, Trumpism. It's ot often we initiate a new horseman."

Sorry

Prehistoric Peeps: Even the 'Derby' had its primeval counterpart.

Domestic event in the Zoological Gardens No. I. - The nose of the hippopotamus put out of joint by the young elephant

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

"Great, the end of the world and I'm going to be first on facebook with pictures!!"

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

OMG UR HOT

'Did spiders invent bungee jumping, Dad?'

OOPS!

"You can tatse the slopes, er I mean hops in this."

Spiders in love

"Just how powerful of a fan did you put in your computer?"

Post-Apocalypse Greeting Card

"Bloody hell, Mavis. . . I was just doing yoga!"

Spider watching his web cam.

"I do appreciate that it eats other bugs, but it also ate my husband."

'I'm just surfing the web.'

'...and they were carnivorous.'

"Vote the Raven: 'Never Trump!'"

A heat wave threatens an old woman.

"It's good it's not windy. . . it makes it easier to catch flies."

A high tech spider with a Velcro web.

"The dating scene is alright for you, female worms are everywhere! But when was the last time you saw a mummy-long-legs?"

'I don't know about you but I spend a fortune on shoes.'

'Is that some kind of a cruel joke? They're not dying, they're turning into Zombies!'

'...and late tomorrow expect hellish rains of fire and blood...'

"I kind of miss the pendulum."

Radioactive Spider Bite - The Real Story

"I still want grandchildren.

'So should I bother with dinner?'

'I bet that new guy can't wait to tell a bunch of tall tales about where he's been and stuff...'

'Yes, this is my first time at speed dating. Is it that obvious?'