Aerobics Teacher Gifts

'I call this exercise 'Urban Aerobics'

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"Lemme know when you’re ready to howl at it."

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

'What goes up, must come down!' 'Not if you give it enough thrust, to send it flying forever across the face of the universe.'

Exercise Class

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

"Papi, will you play build-a-model-rocket-so-we-can-calculate-acceleration-rates-and-thrust-levels-for-maximum-payload with me? Please?!"

Basketball

Keep Fit.

Leaving a Real Impression: That's one small step for (a) man, one giant leap for mankind.

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

The summer of her 39th year, Eleanor could be found most evenings on a hill (known locally as Robert's Hump) doing aerobics of her own devising.

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

Holiday Aerobics.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

'And one and two and let change through and three and four and collapse on the floor.'

"Back in my day, kids had a little respect for the law of gravity."

"See? Two seconds with my quantum physics app."

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

A Newton's cradle wrecking ball.

"Ever since the elevator broke down, we've learned that our staff is in desperate need of a fitness program. Especially, since we're only one floor up."

'The aerobics will give you a more youthful appearance overall, but you need to see a podiatrist about your crows feet.'

'Astronomy I, Astronomy II, Astronomy III'

Plasma Ball

"Uniformly accelerated motion"

"Galileo soon modified his gravity experiments" "Ready to catch it?"

The Soundness of Newton's Laws

There's a popular new health spa down there. The endorphins are having a blast in aerobics. Antibodies are learning kickboxing and the adrenaline is getting some much needed relaxation in the yoga studio. The only problem is the water molecules. Everybody is concerned about them! What's wrong? They haven't been seen since they went into the sauna!

'Curiosity' discovers Mars was at one time like earth.