Advertising Specialists T-Shirts

Baseball Players with QR Codes on their Shirts.

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

'How fast can you hype?'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

What can I do? He says it's his thinking cap.

If nobody had invented graphics

'Gentlemen, we need a slogan!'

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Important Food Groups

"By the end of next week, these fads such as social media, automobiles and making fire will all be over."

Jewellery Shop: Disposable income spoken here.

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'We've re-branded.'

Direct Marketing...

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

A balloon seller is selling thought bubble balloons

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

"I go that extra mile!"

You can fool some of the people all of the time - "Send in some of the people, Dorothy."

'Now I know why they threw in the printer for free. It's only got a resolution of one dot per 8 12 inches.'

"The news is so fake, the ads are beginning to look honest."

"But will it distract the public's attention enough that they mindlessly buy our products?"

The Corner Of Ogden And Nash: Candy is Daddy/Liquor is Quicker

At the mobile tracking test lab.

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

I think you'll appreciate my resume. It's printed on a fridge magnet.