Advertising Professional Pillows

'I like it. It's catchy and easy to remember.'

'Got to admit,as far as mission statements go, it's pretty damn bold.'

"We can't say 'new and improved' until we come up with a product."

Dave finally figured a way of overcoming his fear of talking to people at networking events.

'Great! So I'll run these by the focus groups and see how they go over.'

'...No, he can't really fly...no, the bad guys don't really have a gun...no this cereal really isn't the best food in the whole world...no, it won't make you as strong as a giant...'

'Today's consumer has new priorities, and it's our job to tell them what those priorities are...'

'That's your big marketing plan?'

Advertising Agency - "...It was more moving than Martin Luther King's speech. But...will it sell dog food?"

'Then, for some reason, sales dropped right off.'

Sandwich board with, 'Free lunch at Arnie's' on the back and 'There's no such thing as a...' on the front.

Lemonade Stand: We Don't Pee In Ourz

"Not love. Targeted advertising."

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

"Okay, let me come at this question a different way: Does anybody here actually know how to sell anything?"

"So, please, dig a little deeper and help us get rid of pop-up ads for good."

Peace on Earth

'All our appliances come with energy saving device - off/on switch.'

'In addition to our web, radio/tv and print advertising, we'd like you to add word of mouth. We feel you're the one for the job.'

"Enhanced branding metrics drive robust solutions for scalable monetization of jargon."

'It's called 'wild suburban sex orgies', but thats just for marketing...its actually about 17th century basket weaving'

"It's 1ime we paid attention to effective branding."

Boss: '...Let's not forget who our customers are!' (It turns out they just have one left).

'How long did you work in subliminal advertising?' - 'A split second.'

"Our marketing expansion seems a little haphazard."

"Do you ever get the urge to write something worth reading?"

'Actually, this is when I'm at my most creative, when I don't seem to be doing anything.'

Congratulations You Have Been Selected to Receive a Free Gift Card

'I want a campaign that will fool some of the people some of the time and all of the people all the time.'

Man sees pop-up ad on chalkboard.

At the advertising copy department.

'You have to give him credit. Josh is always looking for new ways to get the marketing message across...'

"Now we're passing by a great big sign urging us to buy sofas!"

"It's a perfect advertising image of marital bliss. All it needs is the disclaimer, Professional Actors, Don't Try This at home."

'Still not punchy enough. Try putting NERO all in capitals...'