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Junk Mail

A man and his cat watch tv

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

If nobody had invented graphics

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

Gerald Ratner's return

As Seen Watching TV

"And now a word from our sponsors...ratings."

'We need to change our marketing strategy.'

"You can whip out one helluva sonnet, Shakespeare, bit for sales copy, this sucks."

Early Sexting

'It began as The Great American Novel...but it finally sold as an infomercial.'

"We only invest in companies that still exist a year after running a Super Bowl ad."

'Then, for some reason, sales dropped right off.'

'I know the marketing budget is stretched...but I still think we need professional models!'

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

"Play it like, sure, the world sees you as just a hamburger, but you know there's so much more to you than that."

'This unexpectedly concludes tonight's program -- the sponsor bailed out.'

"We're ready to give the verdict....after the commercial break."

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

"You want the bookkeeper? Let me put you through to our creative department."

"$68,000? You said that deceptive ad would cost me $23,000."

Marv's Preowned Vehicles...That new car smell can kill you! - Buy Used!

'Thank you for picking me as your ATM machine...but before I dispense your money, here's a word from Ed's Bar & Grill...'

"Dwayne is very important to us. He knows exactly when a trend will become a craze."

'Qool - when the thirst come first.'

Your next cartoon will follow after these advertisements

'And here's old Elias T. Pendergast - a legend in the advertising game. He's the one who successfully marketed the Ass-Expander.'

NHS to encourage hospitals to advertise in a more friendly manner.

A businessman watches as a girl walks past carrying a balloon with his face on it.