Adventure Humorists Pillows

'One good thing about the hurricane is it made our grown kids finally move out.'

'Dear Santa, when I asked for a ship, what I meant was...'

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

Skiing.

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Man fishing with large bait

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

Irritable trowel syndrome.

"Well if it comes to that you're not exactly Mr Wonderful."

Wherever the Trail Leads. . .

'I've been sitting on this mountain for 25 years, and what I've learned is that true happiness can only be found in the soothing relief of a fast-acting hemorrhoid cream!'

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

That dolphin drinks like a fish.

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

"Perhaps I should have warned you...They really don't like wholemeal bread."

'Clayton enjoys living on the edge,'

Goldylocks and the Three Beers.

"Have you farted. . . ?"

'I just know baby is getting as much out of this world trip as we are.'

Destiny is all...

'If a bear attacks and I have to play dead I want it to be as convincing as possible!'

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

Echo Mountain...NO Yodeling! - Falling rock zone.

Ranger has sign saying 'Do not feed the bears'. Bear crosses out sign to read 'Feed the bears'.

"Yes, I do know how to light a fire with two sticks... Provided one of them is a match."

Fish Training

Fly fishing.

'Organically-grown popcorn? Give me a break!'

Eat the grass in perfect circles. It drives them crazy.

'Steady Lulu, steady, ...HEEL!' - The Rare Poodle Retriever.

Acme Coffee Co.

The walking dead