Adventure-awaiting Parents Gifts

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

'Strained carrots again! What am I being punished for this time?'

"Everyone says she has the clutter of someone twice her age."

It's a Boy

Mother CareBaby Gap

"Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 2."

'Have you cleaned behind your ears?'

'BEEP! BEEP! Pregnant Lady Reversing!...'

"We'd love to come, but we can't seem to find a sitter."

Biker couple with their baby in a side car.

'I never believed in spanking children - until today!'

'I think it may be a limited edition.'

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

'Don't come down until your thirty five.'

'You must stop feeding him fish oils to make him cleverer.'

If this is how 3-year-olds see the world, it's no wonder they're always crying."

Baby with projectile vomit

"It gets easier the second time."

'I don't get it! Not one of these books gives the same advice TWICE!

'Cleanliness is next to...impossible.'

'You've lost it Dad - It's gone into that little hole with the flag in it.'

"Normally things don't get me down. But lately, just getting out of bed has been difficult."

'She is being impossible again.'

'Baby escape.'

Take your Daughter to Word Day

'May I borrow your hard hat? I'm going to try and go into the kids' room.'

'Well those stair gates were a complete waste of money'

Nope, not how you change her diaper.

'The great stampedes are over, son. All you can hope for today is an occasional goring.'

Temptation.

'I'm sure this is the right exit .'

'Why are you being a discipline problem at school, turd?'

Midwife presents a baby with its own volume control: 'Finally, evolution has done its thing.'

"Beware of children."