Adult Fiction T-Shirts

The Legacy of 50 Shades of Grey: 'Stay calm madam we will have you out of there in no time.'

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

"Puss in cement boots"

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

"He was WOK-ing in a winter wonderland."

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

'So, in room 1 we sweat them. 2 is for grilling, 3 is for roasting. We leave them to simmer in room 4...'

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

Snow Crime

"You probably would have gotten away with draining the bank account except for one mistake. . . you signed all the checks with the cat's name."

"This, Yorik... Do you know him well?"

"Here’s a book with a pretty peacock on the cover. Let’s try this Flannery O’Connor story before bed."

Man reading 'How not to get caught.'

"Let's just enjoy our holiday. The whole incident with your stalker is over now. We won't see him again."

'There's my place. Technically it's still a crime scene, but you're more than welcome to traipse through it.'

"By Ned, you're right, inspector—the body has been moved."

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

"Oh, that three billion dollars."

CSI: Alaska. "What have we got, Ted?" "Looks like a snowball with a rock in it...I'll know more when I get it back to the lab."

Cop Shop/Fake evidence/Plant now for spring.

Mafia Nursery Rhymes - sorry Weazel, I'm gonna have to pop you.

"Looks like he's been salted, Sarge.2

The Mousetrap, by Agatha Christie

"You're under arrest for an attempted murder."

'Don't feel so bad about this. I'll give you a receipt for tax purposes.'

'He's been shot!'

The Clown Hit

"That's not the stick, it's a blood-stained satchel full of money... but hey, good boy!"

"We the jury find that the murder was committed by Colonel Mustard, in the library, with the candlestick!"

'Oh no! They've been pinched.'