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"Mom, Dad - I'm adopted, aren't I?"

"Foster failure"

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

'He took from the rich and gave to the poor? It sounds like wealth redistribution.'

"Be kind"

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

'Have you been waiting long?'

Fyodor Dostoevsky

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

'I think babies grow in a mommy's tummy and adopted babies grow in a mommy's heart.'

'I know I'm not a kitten, I know I'm sorta fat, But if you will adopt me, I'll be your lovin' cat.' Caption:Shelter Cat Blues

"Now here's a tale that'll make you hair stand on end"

Bob began seeing his mother, who gave him up for adoption, professionally, three times a week. It didn't help much.

"Rescue someone; rescue yourself"

Queen says: 'Mirror, mirror, on the wall ... 'It's all so subjective' is not an acceptable answer.'

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"Sure, Mom, I'll eat first, but then can we discuss my 'overseas adoption'?"

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

'Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Let down your hair extensions.'

'What does the tooth fairy do with all those teeth?'

"'Best wishes'? That's it? That's all you got?!"

'I thought you were going for a walk in the woods. Your porridge has been cooling on the table for hours! '

'I never saw a tracer bullet that I didn't admire for color, clarity and swiftness.'

"I guess people want dogs with no problems. Lucky for me, all I've got is quirks."

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

"Peace. Love. Adopt."

'Pirate's Cove is about a half mile down the beach.'

Fairy tale

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

"He was a rescue."