Adjunct Professor T-Shirts

"Before I was Socrates, I was Socrates the adjunct professor struggling to get tenure."

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

'I know crime doesn't pay, Dean Fenton, but neither does being an adjunct educator of philosophy at a community college.'

"Night of the living adjunct professor" "What's a sabbatical?" "Tenure is boring!" "I have four desks in four schools!" "I have more prestige than a grad student."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

"To talk about the 76% of my time preparing lectures, press one. To talk about why adjunct professors teach most of the classes, press two, to talk. . ."

Tenure Beach/Adjunct Area

"Let's play grown-ups. I'll be the tenured professor. You can be the per-diem teaching assistant."

'Hmph. College kids.'

Thinking Gears

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

'Desert island cartoons - and you?'

"Make a lot of money."

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

U of Debt

'BANG' and a cosmology institute appears.

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."

"The Supreme Court says a corporation is a 'person?' Well, have you ever tried to take a corporation out for a nice, friendly beer?"

The University Cricket Match - a sketch at Lord's.

'I need to borrow your Ph.D. for a half hour tomorrow. I have a major problem to solve.'

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

'Very well, I'll introduce you. Ego, meet ID. Now get back to work.'

'I'm pretty sure I have a Ph.D. I think one came bundled with my new computer.'

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

"The state of graduates literacy levels is shoking and both my colleegs agrree that there maths isn't much better."

'I'd like to go back to law school and pay attention this time.'