Adage Collector Pillows

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

The pen is mightier th... (than the sword)

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

His Hers Pers Vis Xyrs Hirs TBD

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"...Accept finite disappointment, but NEVER LOSE INFINITE HOPE."

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"Let's text her, she'd like that."

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

'I don't care how smart you think you are, you're still a bird brain.'

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

'Did you bring any money? - Enlightenment doesn't grow on trees, you know!'

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

"I wonder what this was for."

'How old is this vase?'

"I never expected you to pay through the nose."

"Hmm interesting Hallmark..."

'My motto is 'What happens at this company, stays at this company'. That's why I take your performance and keep your wage.'

Mr. Tatnall's daycare "Just don't kill each other"

"Get a hold of yourself, Jerry! We ALL knew the risks we were taking with the new corporate motto. When you care, it's easy to get hurt!"

Now that we've invented language, we have to be careful not to get quoted out of context.

'...but the good new is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

'Your entire library consists of nothing but tabloids bound in Corinthian leather?'

young mother with a baby being bombarded by advice on parenting from older mothers

Pawnshop: Genuine Fake Watches.

'Stamp auction' WW2 Victory stamps on two fingers

'To you, fifty quid - c'mon guv, it's HANDMADE!'