Acquaintances Pillows

'Whether we find my contact lens or not, I want to thank you all anyway, for becoming involved.'

"I haven't seen you in ages - have you not been hiding under a rock?"

"I know they should be invited to our house next, but can't we just give them the cash equivalent and call it even?"

Chairs - a bar where everybody has a seat!

"I forget — do we like the Rizzos?"

"Should we send a card to that couple we met in Cornwall, in 1993?"

"Ok, remember, we can't ttalk about anything that matters with these guys anymore."

'Now we have to guess if they want to go for the double cut next year and be done with it...or if they hope we'll send a card and keep the tradition going. . .'

'The three essentials for any wine are terroir, the producer and how envious it makes your guests.'

"Now I remember why we don't visit the Ferguson's more often!"

Shepherd and eurydice

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Wildlife

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

"They think we're their best friend. Just play along with it."

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

"I said I wanted to visit the Brandenburg Gate."

The Henderson's move to a vertical city took some getting used to.

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

"We thought we would come somewhere remote to self-isolate."

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

'Are we nearly there yet?'

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

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