Accounts Payable Specialist Gifts

Accounts payable desk has trays marked 'A day late' and 'A dollar short'

'I'm afraid we never use the 'I' word around here...'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

I'm not making enough money to like you.

"Why yes, there was an extra five thousand dollars in my pay check last week...er...I thought it was a raise."

Sheep Ledger

"You'll feel a pinch now and another one when the bill comes."

'Your night writing book, madam.'

"What comes after zillion?"

And this is a little ditty I wrote called 'the third quarters profit and loss account' ...Colin often wished that he'd followed his first love and taken up a career as a musician

'Yes,we have equal pay in that we are grossly underpaid, all of us.'

'And this is the computer that sends out our final demands.'

Accountant Bedtime Stories

"I never said they were well-compensated. I just said they were paid handsomely."

Get a Job

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

'In tonight's debate, Ms. Johnson will argue the merits of accrual-based accounting, while Mr. Wilcox will defend the 'Don't Be Accrual' method!'

"You're in luck...I've unearthed those payroll records from 3 years ago."

'Are you the genius who came up with the 'Alternative Payment' program?'

'What wine goes with enormous expense account?.'

Human Resources Dept: Full time/part time/over time/time and a half/time out.

'The numbers aren't working.'

'I LOVE the smell of cooked books.'

"I'm a soul trader."

"Here's your paycheck. I hope we'll both find it amusing."

'Worldcon' - financial statement fraud exposed.

'I take it you're looking to some extra hours!'

'Nothing this week †between your pay and your deductions, you broke even.'

'Thanks for not asking for a rise.'

'Running away from the circus to join the world of accountancy isn't working out as I expected. . .'

'You can't cash your paychecks until your 6 month probation is satisfactorily over.'

Bureau of Missing Persons, "He works flextime and we have direct deposit, so it took me a few months to notice he was gone."

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

'My pay envelope is empty.' - 'Your deductions equal your salary'