Accidental Athlete Pillows

'I tripped over one of those 'Caution Slippery Floor' signs.'

A skier who has hit a solitary tree

"I hope your cast is not itchy, Stacy. I had an itchy cast on my arm once and it itched ALL the time. It felt like crawling ants! Itchy, itchy, itchy..."

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

Rollerblader wears a cast and has wheels on crutches

'It wasn't premeditated.

'He has a learning disorder.'

"Sorry, but that's a road racing bike. I'm a mountain bike specialist."

A football referee accidentally shoots his starting pistol in his pocket.

"I understand you were involved in a golf mishap this morning!"

'There was a time when I considered making myself available for the NBA draft. But one day I realized, hey - I'm a slug! I don't have an athletic bone in my body!'

'It's an old badminton injury.'

A statue of a baseball player swinging a bat stands next to a building with a broken glass window.

"Now he decides to start work on the crazy paving."

'I was directing my feet to the sunny side of the street, and a BEER TRUCK got me.'

"As always. . . make sure to warm up . . . to avoid injury. . ."

'My hubby is unusually handy about the house. . . unusual in that, he is always the problem to the solution!'

Football taunting man with a broken leg.

Hair trigger

"Wonderful holiday! Two-weeks skiing really makes you feel like a new man!"

Emergency Ward - "The handle fell off his shooting stick, and he forgot!"

'During my trip around the World, I took some pictures with this new digital camera... here is my finger covering the lens in Sidney... here in New York... Rome... Lisbon... Hamburg...'

Golfing Accident

'I didn't come to fall in. I came to fish.'

'Oops sorry, but it is such a big target'

A cleaning lady presses the launch button on a rocket.

'My husband hadn't kicked up his heels in 20 years, but he couldn't leave well enought alone.'

Secure Your Ladder

"I wasn't paying attention in school and accidentally became an attorney."

'Typical village match. He has his pads strapped to his wellies.'

"Stop using the ointment."

'Trust me, Harold. I'm getting better every day. I can do this. You're not still angry about yesterday, are you, Harold?'

We Pile 'Em High Store: '. . . no touching!'

'Thank goodness Robert Green deflected attention.'

"Well, how was I supposed to know the other driver wasn't going to turn left?!"