Acceptance Into A Private School Pillows

Mum and Dad had a hell of a job getting me into this school.

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

The MBA Draft

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

Yummy Mummies

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

'The bad news is you failed all your courses. The good news is you passed the urine test.'

"No, I'm not the first in my family to attend college. But I am the first at an Ivy."

"Class, this is Mr. Elzondo. He's going to talk about going to college."

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

"This is my last day. My parents found a more expensive school on the East Side."

Treadway college - A little knowledge, a lot of tuition.

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

Scenes we'd most like to see...

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'Cat Lit. You?'

"Dad, the dean has gone over your financial statement, and he doesn't think you're working up to your full potential."

"I'd put his name down for Eton if I could spell it!"

'Good news Mom. I was accepted to the college of your choice.'

You got into the college of my choice, and I got into the college of your choice. Now if we could just work something out...

'It's a private school. Can't say which one, it's private.'

'He's researching out-of-state kindergartens.'

"Oh, it's a grand day for Harvard!"

"Mom, Dad, college changed me."

'...All profits are local.'

Private School Interview - 'How much do your parents weigh?'

Popular college book: How to say 'Send money' in 101 languages.