Attending Private College Pillows

'If you're rich enough to send me to a fancy, private college, why do I have to go?'

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

Yummy Mummies

'I'm afraid it's bad news Mr.Hooper, I've just got the report on your finances.'

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

"This is my last day. My parents found a more expensive school on the East Side."

"How many letters can you read?"

"I'd put his name down for Eton if I could spell it!"

'It's a private school. Can't say which one, it's private.'

Private School Interview - 'How much do your parents weigh?'

'Kitchen! Chicken Bone! Hurry!!' - Rent-A-Surgeon

Landlubbers ONLY!

'Manners are the noises you don't make while you eat.'

Pirate Artist

"Son, we didn't spend a fortune on your education so you can 'just be yourself.'"

Introducing: Eye-Quit. The Nicotine Patch for Pirates...

Learjet

"When I said let's scuttle her. I meant that ship over there."

"I'm sorry but the bubbles make me giggle."

"Same ship, different day."

"I'm leaning towards NYU."

Mum and Dad had a hell of a job getting me into this school.

"...I'll sit here pretending to be interested but I'll actually be writing a shopping list and fantasising about my plumber!"

'-and you do realise,of course,that as a private patient tipping is permitted?'

"Welcome to our private banking group."

'He's my father and I say we dump him pricate...!'

"Watch out for his left hook!"

"Next time I'm getting a parrot instead of a woodpecker!"

The captain realised that if he were to continue to strike fear into mens hearts, he must never be seen in a state of undress.

"How our teacher, under my surveillance, spent her summer vacation..."

"Why can't you give me a student loan? I'm a student."

'Mommy and Daddy have taken care of the high cost of private school tuition. The rest is up to you.'

Pirate: 'No No No,you BLITHERING Dunderheads! We do that AT Sea!!'

''Up, up, and away!' -- big deal!'

'Any of you guys got a 'C' reg corvette?'